such a crappy messy mix of emotions past few days.  I just want to leave, but I also want to stay.

So hard throwing away all this stuff (that I don't want or use). The mass of it makes me feel guilty.  A million decisions that should be easy, but they add up to so much angst!

I'm in this between place where I don't belong here anymore, but I'm not comfortable there just yet.  Reminds me of all my apt moves.  That weird feeling of being in a new place with unknown people all around.

I remember my first few days in the Hudson I would take Remi in and out through the stairs and garage.  I felt so weird going in the elevator and lobby -- so public and conspicuous.  Ridiculous but real.  I just wanted to be discreet.  I didn't feel like I belonged.

Anyway - it's really hard.  But we have made a lot of progress in a week.  Hex has made a million handcart trips.  And I'm surprised that the new studio doesn't seem packed. Maybe it will?

The BIG THINGS have yet to make it over.  They are the ones that really scare me.