Friday, February 27, 2009

dear dave,

I'm shoving pretzel sticks into my mouth like there is no tomorrow. They are the perfect size, and covered in salt. I love them. Crispy and delicious.

Friday blahs at the studio. Talk of going to a movie dissolved into "I should work"s. Everybody seems extra chatty. IT's funny how things ebb and flow. It feels like a day of transition.

Happy this morning, because we will be able to move out early, and not pay double rent on the apt this month. THat is terrific news.

Its time to find my focus, and block out all the chatter/ and pretzel sticks around me! Printing tomorrow. F_O_C_U_S!

Thursday, February 26, 2009

around the studio

dear dave,
very quiet in the studio today. I have my coffee, and I'm happy about that.

Getting my hair cut, sending out some shirts, and preparing for printing Saturday. I'm paralyzed when it comes to a few other things. Baby steps!!


Wednesday, February 25, 2009

dear dave,

going thru all my art, and feeling pretty good about all that I have accomplished since September. I'm proud of my work, and where I'm going. I think it has my character, and my personality, and I'm really excited to see where it all leads.

Here's to BRANDDAVE and FREEHAND and the happy future ahead! (clink)

friend of the week

dear dave,

I'm instituting a new feature to this blog called "friend of the week". I want to feature friends and supporters who interest me and inspire me.

This week it's Lori. Check out her blog, and soak her up. I think she is such an original. She has her own way, and gradually I'm seeing that, and really appreciating it. Thanks Lori for all your support!

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

dear dave

Feel sort of locked up over the past few days. Other considerations have been on my mind. What to do about this and that? All these what-ifs and worries. I don't feel over it, but I want to be.

It's tuesday afternoon, and I'm not feeling so creative. Went for a walk to the bookstore, and that overwhelmed me. Lots of great new ads, and terrific editorials. The Debbie Downer in me sees them differently now though, like they are last gasps. Nobody wants what they have to sell. Or that is all the news lately. Magazines going down. Clothing lines going down. Stores going down. Where is the bottom?

I feel stuck in this mindset. I scold myself - BE POSITIVE, but my head creeps back into this space.

Saturday, February 21, 2009

dear dave,

in the studio on a Saturday, not printing like I tell myself I should be doing. I guess I wanted to be here instead, but for some reason I feel guilty about that. Haven't been feeling the screen printing lately. Or I just don't know what I want to do. After December, i sort of got out of that mode, and I don't know how to find my back. But I need to!

I guess it takes time to commit to a print. Getting the paper, planning the positives, picking the colors. Every step seems like a potential cliff. An investment.

Like everybody, I haven't much been in the mood to invest a lot lately.

But I know - that is the the solution I'm looking for.

Friday, February 20, 2009

dear dave

Listening to Jessica Simpson, just wanting to turn my music up LOUD, and enjoy the day. So much anxiety and fear about all the stuff surrounding me. Maybe its crazy, but I just feel like sweeping it away, and dancing. Maybe I'm just overwhelmed. We all need a break!

Fun making music, and thinking about little videos, but I have to get real. Reality is staring me in the face. Time to face the music.

What am I doing?

Must prepare for printing, make some t's for saturday, buy some paper, look at my bank account, visit Jimmy, and face the future.

sorry Jessica, but the party is over (for now).

Thursday, February 19, 2009

dear dave,

eating my sandwich, listening to Kid A. Sunny day. Picking up my car at 4:30. Think I'll work on the photography site. it needs major help. What am I doing?

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

dear dave

I am so interested in this morbid chimp rampage story. The biting off of the hands, the mangled face. The new hairdo the victim had. The owner running inside to retrieve a butcher knife. The police pinned down in the car. Thinking the victim was a man. The retreating chimp.

I can't get enough details. I'm sorry.

back to drawing.

Tuesday, February 17, 2009


dear dave,

how can we all not feel such anxiety? It's pervasive. The economy just gets worse, and that's whats on my mind. Scary stuff. I try to stay positive.

I've decided to concentrate on FREEHAND for a few days. I havn't been drawing much lately. Most of the photos I took have been gone thru and edited. I started my new photog blog. No models are scheduled. I'm tempted to post another ad, but think it's probably best to try and learn my new camera, and regroup.

Monday, February 16, 2009

two shots from Friday night w/ kevin H. So much fun!

dear dave,

just looked at some of the mini movies I made last spring, and listened to my little songs. Fun. i want to do more with them. Ha- then I put on a song I downloaded free from itunes. Really great. made my little songs sound HORRIBLE. Oh well.

Having issues comparing myself to other artists this weekend. Why do I do that? Its always a black hole - I should see that. Run away! Instead I need to focus on doing better. Learning. Trying harder.


planted some grass, in honor of the warm weather last week. Its nice to have something so green and fresh around. We cut the top off a bit last week, and stood over it and enjoyed in the fresh smell. Soooo good. I guess we are craving spring.

Saturday, February 14, 2009

dear dave

editing photos is fun, and frustrating. I see the things I should have seen before. I wish I had seen. Most of the time I'm lucky, and don't see flaws. Maybe they are there, but I'm blind to them.

Anyway, the studio doesn't work well during the day. Or I need to work on lights, big time. Things are looking flatter then I want them to be. I hate technical things! I can't be bothered. I fall in love with the moment.

Great photo shoots last night, and today. Kevin and Dan, if your reading this - thanks a lot! They both went well. Really cool to get to know new people, and to feel such encouragement. I feel re energized and creative, and feel like I'm on a path I want to be on. It feels good to be so satisfied with my artwork.

Friday, February 13, 2009


upside down night last night. It seems liked everybody did something unusual. Was there a full moon?

Meeting at the studio, which was really productive. Excited about some things we have coming up.

Weird interactions with a potential model (I will leave it at that).

Have a shoot tonight, and one planned for tomorrow. Will see.

Car still stuck in no mans land. blah blah blah.

Not so much in the mood to write. Scattered head. Crazy because I haven't been getting to sleep easily lately, and when I'm sitting in bed, my mind is just buzzing and focused. I'm creative and thoughtful and deliberate. Then, when I sit at my desk in the morning, I'm scattered. Distracted. Muddled. sucks. I need to find my center.

where are you?

Thursday, February 12, 2009

dear dave,

I had a great time working with Dave K yesterday. It was unseasonably warm, so we were able to shoot outside.

A lot of fun, and good experience for me -- and I'm really happy with the result. I'm learning, and I'm doing what I have ALWAYS wanted to do. Super fun. Nerve racking at first - but I managed to find my groove. Plan to work with Dave again - I think he's a keeper.

Warm day today, with a windy kick. Feel content at the studio, but stalled. For some reason, I just can't kick start some major projects. What's it going to take to move me along? DEADLINES.

More guys lined up over the next few days. Fingers crossed that they follow thru.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

I walk across the world, but I don't know where I'm going

I see a different place every time

random bacon lines the streets
and turn the lights all gooey

when I wake up
I'm still tired
so I turn the chair around

where I was I'm very unsure
my hands are sore
and dirty

the trees look down on me
but I've done nothing wrong
I'm sure of it

just wait until tomorrow I tell myself
and close my other lid

blog stats

I'm impressed.

I just ran the numbers, and this is what I found:

Since March 2008 "dear dave" has been visited 2,363 times, by 722 unique people from 56 countries or territories, with 4,587 page views.

Thats pretty cool.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

freehand updated

I decided FREEHAND is way too cold. Originally I really liked how blank it was. No words. No distractions. But I've slowly started to think it needs more.

Saturday, I overheard a conversation about a gallery show, and the artist said she always sells more when she is in the gallery, talking about her work. This makes a lot of sense. Like I have said before, I need to learn how to talk about my artwork more.

All this to say I have begun adding comments to my FREEHAND posts. Little bits and bites about the artwork I've posted.

Im only about a third way thru, but so far so good.

personality deleted

I was on the elliptical last night, and realized my photo blog was ill conceived. So today I whacked it. I guess I got ahead of myself.

I have some photo shoots lined up. We'll see how they turn out, and go from there.

I still love the idea. photos/videos. But what to do with them. Where am I headed?

I just don't know.

I don't know.

future - reveal thyself.

remi likes to lay on top of me (lately)

mixed bag

dear dave

a lot of angst. Disrupted sleep. Frustration over getting my car fixed. I just want it fixed! Waiting for calls from the insurance companies is TORTURE. Waiting for calls /emails about anything lately has been torture. Why don't people get back to me? Has everything come to a grinding halt? Days just go by. GRRRRRRRR!

I'm feeling sooooo impatient.

Talked with analya about her friends that are working on an opera. The kicker--they expect it to take 5 years to complete! That really struck me. I love the idea of setting off on a 5 year project. But then I quickly realize that's just how life is. Hours add up to days add up to months add up to years. I know its not an original thought, but it got me thinking (again). What seeds am I planting now that would/could blossom in 5 years? I'm excited.

Jimmy's treatment weighing on me heavily. Its hard to deal with. Its hard to feel happy when I think of her in bed, exhausted and sick. I just pray she feels better soon.

Monday, February 9, 2009

dear dave

feeling blah and bad, but IM PUSHING THRU. My parked car was hit by a METRO bus yesterday, which was not a big deal, until I discovered later that the brake lights were broken, which means I can't drive it. That sucks. No car means much less mobility. No visit to Rockville. No working at the corcoran. I'm a bit grounded until the insurance ball starts rolling.

Jimmy not doing well either. Hit hard. Praying she stays strong.

I'm moving forward. With art, photography, excersice and hexy.

Saturday, February 7, 2009

dear dave

class today. Really crazy and chaotic, but I managed to get a simple print made. Probably best to work during the week, since I can. It's tough competing for space, and sinks. I go crazy.

I decided to cut my losses on the print I had planned to do. I don't think I would have been happy with it, and it would have taken a lot of time. I'm down on myself for my laziness lately. "Is simplicity best, or simply the easiest?"

Back at the studio, and feel sort of content. Its sunny and warm outside, and the rest of the day is free.

Friday, February 6, 2009

dear dave,

feel antsy today. Signed lease last night, and move is set for March.

When we left this morning, we noticed the bike rack was all disheveled, and H's bike had been stolen. Sucks. Feels crappy.

Came into work this morning, and feel discouraged. All my great models seemed to have abandoned me. Suddenly they don't return emails. Not sure what is going on, but its bummed me out. How could there be a mass defection? I hate it when people suddenly stop communicating. I never know what to do, and I get hung up. Should I look for more?

I guess I will draw, and listen to Radiohead, and see if I can get myself out of this mini funk. Open studio today, but I feel like being to myself.

Thursday, February 5, 2009

dear dave

personality improved. Driving home last night, I felt so unsettled. It's so funny how things work - I'm always so anxious to push art out, even before it's done. I used to hang my mobiles up while they were still wet. Sometimes they would just collapse. But I didn't care so much, because I was responsible, and it was my creation, and impatience.

Anyway, I'm happy with all the changes Ive made to all the blogs. I feel much more settled.


I will look back at this year as GOLDEN. I really am in an amazing position. I can do what I want, when I want. Just having the time to be creative is such a LUXURY. I know I am very very lucky.

I need to draw. After I eat, that is what I will do.

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

personality LAUNCHED!

dear dave,

another day, another blog.

Today I launched personality, a site for my photography and video projects. So thats 3 blogs for me, and one for the studio. we'll see.

One suffers while the other one blossoms. My very typical M.O. But I wanted a place to put my new photos, and this gives me a place. Already it has evolved, from photos of guys, to MY photos of guys, to MY photos of anything. I guess I like variety. I like things all mixed up. Maybe I will throw some drawings in too.

dear dave - personal/professional blog about work and life and branddave with photos and drawings and videos

FREEHAND - drawings and prints and paintings and photos (with drawings)

personality - photos and videos

Here's to all my blogs, and the people who read them (?)

dear dave

Excited to see blog traffic up again. I sure wish I knew where it came from. Analytics only tells me so much.

Had my coffee, and have a plan:

schedule boys
leave at 5
chicken party with kim and erin

Listening to Andy Gibb (Love Is) Thicker Then Water, which makes me happy. Easy listening. Reminds me of driving home from church with my family and carpool, top 40 on the car radio, all of Sunday afternoon spread out before me.

Realized this morning, on my way in the door, that I haven't been drawing much lately. I come in and work on the computer all day, but seemed to have put drawing aside. I miss it. Feel like I've been doing a lot of administrative work lately, but what do I have to show for it? Its like vapor.

Blah blah blah, I'm bored with myself. I just want to be swept away by Andy's groovy beat. Take me away Andy!

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

buzz shower from Dave Peterson on Vimeo.

dear dave,

working on blog for studio 4903, so i haven't had much time to work on my own blogs, and artwork.

Just found this great blog thru JD Ferguson:

contributing editor

LOVE IT! Want to put the whole damn thing in my pocket, and call it a day. I love the layout. And its all done thru blogger! amazing. Something to strive for.

ANYWAY, its a nice day, and Im busy busy busy. Working on graphic design stuff for Beverly, and the studio. Must get back to my shirts in preparation for photo shoots next week. Excited about those! I think I have some cool guys to work with. Which brings me to another thought - what am I going to do with these photos? I really don't know the answer yet. I guess they are practice for something yet to come.

Need to concentrate on work to screenprint also. H is tightening the screws. I think some more studio time has opened up. I have the materials I need now. I just need to get cracking!

Lots to do and think about and organize. Exciting.
I love this

Sunday, February 1, 2009

dear dave

I had a post yesterday almost done, but then had to send it to draft mode, and now it doesn't seem timely to post it anymore.

oh well.

it was about not eating a doughnut, and eating a banana instead. But this morning I ate a brownie for breakfast, and didn't exactly kill the elliptical last night. Discipline is a constant struggle. I let myself get away with murder. The ebb and flow of determination and defeat. Regret is not motivational enough (it seems)

Watching the TRUE LIFE specials about the drug addicts was an eye opener. While I don't have any issues with drugs, that whole addiction cycle is easy to relate to. The rush of excitement when I'm getting what I want, and the deep low of disgust after I realize what Ive done, and can't go back. Then, the "oh well - I'll do better next time" that caps it all off.


anyway, its monday, Feels povitol for a lot of people - kim, sue, and most especially Jimmy. I'm thinking about them all, and hoping for the very best.