Wretched grieving the loss of Sue.  Haunted by the idea that I will never see her again, smell her, and hold her.  I will miss her forever and ever and ever.

Lots of her things to sort through and distribute.  A daunting task.

I searched high and low through her room and car and phone for something that she may have written.  Found a bunch of sequential notes on an ipod, written a few years ago.  Insights to what she was dealing with, but all very much of what I already understood.

It's just so sad.  I realize I have 50 years worth inside of emotions and upsets and worries for her well being.  And a million memories of fun and love.  I have to be determined to think of things in a positive light:  She is finally free.  And in a wierd and obvious way, so am I.