image: beautiful body/beautiful photograph copied from a magazine saturday

dear dave,

I had a chance to look back at past November entries yesterday, and was struck at the decline in my optimism. I was so excited about my creative rebirth, and looking forward to the future. I have a much different mindset lately. I prefer the old me.

Had a really rough time with my new prints on Saturday. Screens didn't work out so well, and then when I finally was printing, my registrations were way off. I am printing an edition of 4, and it requires a lot more care.

Finally I just had to give up, call it a day, and go home. I hadn't set it up properly, and there was really no way to recover. So now in about a half an hour Im going back to try again.

Friday night opening was rough for a few reasons. I felt very disengaged with the show, and was freaked out about the whole issue with j. I left early to join Hex, and that turned out to be the wrong choice. All I ended up feeling was regret for not having put forth a little more effort. The bad feelings lingered into Sunday. These things have a way of staying with me.

It's a new week, and a new day. This morning I finally squared my LLC issues (as best I could) and so I feel a weight off my shoulders.

I've been so conflicted and frustrated and mucked up. I keep hoping that the path will clear up, and I'll feel more confident about where I stand.

The optimism is still there, just diluted a bit.